its funny because its true

Well, I'm a little late on posting this meme. They were all the craze last week amongst bloggers, SO here I am, as fashionably late as ever, Darlings... (spoken in an Absolutely Fabulous voice)

Oh, if you really knew me you would know:

I am an only child, a middle child, the oldest of four, and the youngest of three. It’s safe to say that I am a sister to several.

I am the keeper of many, many secrets.

I am a news junky.

I was given my first typewriter for my 5^th birthday.

Wrote my first ‘story’ by my 6^th birthday.

I have a dream of completing a novel. Right now, I have notes, an outline, the first three pages, and several random pages. It is not as easy as I remember when when I was six was.

I swear like a sailor!

I am a compulsive picture taker. I own way to many cameras and I bought the iPhone, in particular, because of the camera and photo apps available. My kids jokingly call me Paparazzi Mama.

I suffer from mild migraines, but lately they have been getting worse. I think its time to call the doc.

My husband is my best friend. Always has been, always will be.  Hands down, no questions asked. Its him.
Yet he gets on my nerves so badly that I want to throat punch him daily. 
I love that man.

I am much more disappointed in my lack of personal accomplishments than I could ever express in words. 

I have anger issues.

I am a horrible cook.

I am overly sensitive about way to many things. I try not to let this show because I know how ridiculous it is that I care about so much that has nothing to do with me.

I cry during movies, commercials, songs, books, anything. If it truly moves me, I promise you, I am probably fighting back tears.

I am happiest during a Midwest fall. I miss the crisp to the air and the colors of the trees. Desert life is not for me.

I am a roller derby wanna be.  I wish there were more hours in a day and I wish there was a Derby Fairy & she would bring me all the awesome gear required for practice & play. Shits expensive!

I over think and over analyze EVERYTHING and I usually make myself miserably sick because of this bad habit.

My dad has stage 4 Melanoma cancer. The doctors told him he would be lucky to make it another 12 months. That was two years ago. Sadly, he is the person I am least compassionate to. I'm working on this.  

I love bad jokes. Like, really love them.  
Did you hear the one about the roof?

I want to be covered in amazing tattoos, but I am scared of how some respected family members would react. My parents wouldn’t mind, but other elder family members would. I wish I didn’t care about what they thought of me.



I have severe body image issues. 

I lose everything. Everything. From keys to wallets to sunglasses to jewelry to phones to children. It is, by far, the most frustrating thing. 

LOA Already, WHAT!

Tis true. I must take a leave of absence from Roller Derby ALREADY! Not by choice and not due to any injuries. Duty calls, and by that I mean, the husband will be gone for a while with the military. And as any good Army Wife would do, I have to cancel things in my life in order to hold down the fort and take care of things at home while he is away. I'm not complaining or anything, really I'm not. This is a way of life for us. My kids need me home at night more than they need to be at the neighbors (kids may disagree here, they love going to the neighbors.)

Since I will have nothing derby related to blog about for the next month or so, I will leave you with this:

I have heard time & time again that the most descriptively true roller derby quotes are  
"roller derby saved my soul" and "roller derby ruined my life." 
It is very time consuming. The hubs has already showed a slight bit of jealousy towards the amount of time I am either at practice, researching derby rules, or looking for awesome new gear online. But we are still new to the game and I am confident that everything will work itself out.

Here are a few phone snaps from the last week or so:

Snazzy new tights!

de agua

Gots to stay hydrated!

Hijacked the hubs army bag.

Gear fits perfectly in here, who knew?

Skates: check, helmet: check, crappy pads (need these): check,

mouth & wrist guards: check, check

*Ready to rock*

Fresh Meat

Juliet:
"What's in a name? That which we call a rose
By any other name would smell as sweet."
Romeo and Juliet (II, ii, 1-2)

Do you know why this blog has the title of Ballistic Gypsy? No? Well, pull up a chair, my friend, I have a story to tell. 

Well over a year ago, I was reflecting on my life, as I often do. I was thinking about my accomplishments, misadventures, and everything I still longed to do and experience. 

One thing I could not stop thinking about was joining a roller derby team. 

I mentioned this to my BFF and the hubs. The husband, who is often sarcastic and/or condescending, but ALWAYS supportive, started tossing name ideas around. Since I married and left home so early in life, I felt the name Gypsy needed to be in there. Now, Gypsy alone, I like, but it just wouldn’t do, not for this Roller Derby [Wanna-Be.]

We had so many ideas. I even had a poll up on the blog here for a while and let people vote on what sounded best to them. Ultimately, my gun-loving guy suggested Ballistic Gypsy and it stuck. I would say ‘and the rest is history,’ but it’s not. Not. At. All. It is only the beginning for Ballistic Gypsy. 

Last week I went to check out our local roller derby team. I was pleasantly surprised by the whole experience. The girls were warm and welcoming; they exceeded all of my expectations. So much so, I went back for more on Sunday. I laced up my skates and did laps as I begged my body to remember how to skate-then stop. Tomorrow night, I plan on signing up with the team and in a few months I hope to transform into my alter ego Ballistic Gypsy and wreak havoc on unsuspecting derby girls. Muhaha! 

Acta Non Verba

The tag line for this blog is “and other odd things I like” it’s not “hey, look what I can do” I think I forgot that when I jumped on the crafty bandwagon. Who could blame me though; making things is so much fun and ridiculously addictive. And I don’t want to brag, but I have been told that I am quite badass with a hot glue gun.  Pretty much, I just want to clarify what my blog is about. Random shit. There will be days where I don my crafty hat, my mommy hat, my crazed army wife hat and hopefully, soon, a roller derby helmet. (Much more derby talk to come)

You know that song by Ozzy ‘Going Through changes’ ? That seems to be my theme song at the moment (minus the part about losing my woman). It’s not that I am just now going through changes, but that I am always changing, as I’m sure most of you are as well.

Ms. S.G.T said it best when she said, “going through life one identity crisis at a time.”  Boy, she sure hit that nail on the head. 

Part of my ‘change’ and my new lease on life-my New Year’s resolution. Acta Non Verba (this will be tattooed on me asap). Acta non verba is Latin meaning Actions Not Words. This year I vow to face my fears and stop talking about what I want to do in life. I’m just going to get off my ass and DO THEM. Roller Derby is one of those fears/dreams. Always wanted to do it, but never had the guts. Screw that, that’s no way to live. That’s not how I want my kids to live. Thus, I am totally proud to say that I just ordered my first pair of derby skates, a rad pair of Riedell’s (oooo yea) 

 and I have my awesome new mouth guard and case from Protech Dent. I need to get my helmet and pads and get by butt out there! I have also joined the gym. I’ve been working out about 4 days a week to prepare myself for the beatings I’m going to get once I am able to find a league and skate with them. I gotta say, from working out I have found a new level of self confidence that I didn’t have before. Overall, I am happy with life right now. Yea, I said it. Happy happy, joy joy! :)

We are moving soon, and I hope where we move to has a derby league, but that is part of being a military spouse. We reluctantly gladly postpone our wants for the needs of our family and move where we are told to move.  We are going to one of two places. Place A- I have already contacted the roller derby league and will be going to practice within the first couple of weeks of moving. This makes me happy! Or Place B- Where there are no leagues for at least 100 miles and we will be out in the middle of nowhere. This makes me sad, but happy because it would mean my husband could be with us longer instead of bi-yearly deployments A- I have the option to accomplish a goal, but he leaves. Or B- My wants are put on hold and he stays.  Ah, it’s the lovely catch 22.